The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

A perfect title for my day.

The Good: I like plants. I like taking care of them, and enjoy the oxygen they return to me in thanks. So, I bought some hanging strawberry plants when I was helping Mom get her garden annuals. They're on my condo balcony and loving it. And this morning, I was able to pick 4 nice red strawberries and devour them. Nothing like fresh berries - as opposed to those stale, chemical laced, pithy California berries we get up here.

The Bad: I went hiking yesterday with Kim to Elbow Falls and Fullerton Loop in Kananaskis. It was a bit rainy and definatley muddy so upon returning home, it was straight into the washing machine with the hiking pants. All good, save for the fact I left my wallet in my pants. Don't you hate that? Extracting all your soggy receipts / credit cards / cash / etc. Plus, my wallet shrank.

The Ugly: It was movie night last night. We went and saw Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. WARNING TO THOSE WHO HAVE NOT SEEN IT ---- DO NOT READ FURTHER !! Anyways, I am a huge fan of Harrison Ford and of course the Indiana Jones trilogy. Thus, I was quite excited to see another movie in this series. It has been a while since I had been so anxious to see a movie. It sucked. I don't even know where to start. Was it a comedy? A political drama? An action movie? A long-lost love story? Aaaarrgh. So many cheesy things and terrible one-liners. What is with the reunion with Marion Ravenwood? No mention of her the last 2 movies. And of course Mud HAS to end up being his son. Blaaaa!! Watch for the next movie in the series where we find out that Indy's adopted brother is actually Superman and that his second cousin once removed is Balki Bartokomous. Yes, it's Indiana Jones and the Deadly Bumblebees of Mepos. Now, that Indy is tough. I've seen him survive getting dragged along the rocky desert floor by Nazi troop carrier trucks...I've seen him survive almost getting his heart ripped out some by some crazed Eastern shaman...and even survive being immolated in an oil fire in the sewers of Venice. But, for someone to survive being a couple of miles away from ground zero during a nuclear explosion by jumping into an old fridge? Come on. This scene summed up the entire movie for me ---- a huge bomb.

Dancing With the Nerds

A couple of weekends ago - Mother's Day weekend - a few of us headed up to Dr. Rob & Jocelyn's cabin at Gull Lake to help put in his dock for the summer. There's nothing better than sitting on Rob's dock - it's soooo long.


Anyhow, I thought I'd share some of the wackiness that ensued.

Rob and I headed up Friday morning, fueled by some sweet A&W Homestyle Bacon n' Egger combos. If you haven't tried them, I would suggest doing so. The meal is far better than the traditional McDonald's breakfast from the lovely less-greasy hash browns to the thick cut bacon. Anyways, we proceeded to the Red Deer Home Depot to rent what Rob had quoted as "possibly the two most dangerous pieces of yard maintenance equipment in existence." After using them, I tend to agree. We drove away with a 13 hp stump grinder and a brush cutter. The stump grinder is used, well, to obliterate old stumps sticking up out of a lawn. Rob had about 25 of them, ranging from 6" to 20" around and up to 1 foot tall. You start this bastard of a machine, lock the brake, engage the blade clutch, and hold on. It's like a chainsaw blade but instead of teeth, it spins chunks of metal about the size of a padlock at 3-4000 rpm. You would not want to get your foot stuck in there, or you'd definitely be running circles the rest of your life. Stumps gone with no problems but lots of sweat. Secondly, the brush cutter. Imagine a circular saw, you know...the kind used by thumbless carpenters. Now imagine the blade unprotected spinning on the end of a 4 foot pole. Yes, this is the brush cutter. You swing this back and forth along the ground, and can clear quite a large area fairly quickly - trees up to 1 inch just fall by the wayside. I felt like I was back in the old days playing DOOM for hours on end... "Take that, floating screaming skull!" So, Friday saw all yard duties completed. And yes, we were good boys and wore all the necessary safety equipment. In fact, I'm quite sure neither of us had worn so much orange ever before between the gloves, hard hat, safety visor and Kevlar chainsawing pants.


Rob's yard was now ready to host a variety of outdoor fun, including football, cups, and the use of the Green Monster - his sweet dirtbike. Check me out below on this sweet hog. That was the very first time I'd ever ridden a motorbike - I know, I know, I look like a natural with my sweet ridin' leathers and cool boots, but really - first time. I'm ready to jump some flaming buses.

Friday night entailed some sweet cheesy buffalo smokies and beverages - and the late arrival of Jamie and Pistol Pete. Then the Wii challenges began. More on that later.

Saturday started with immediate Wii challenges until Blake and Monteith showed up. The whole crew had arrived - time to put the dock in. We were blessed with nice, sunny weather which was a complete contrast to the murky frigid water of Gull Lake in early May. Here's a shot of the lake from Rob and Jocelyn's cabin. A beautiful spot, to be sure.

The 200 foot long dock was put together in sections, bolted together one-by-one. It was quite a smooth operation and much satisfaction was gained upon its completion. Lastly, the boat hoist was muscled into place and DONE. Awesome! First dock on the lake that year! Suckers! Except that the next day, a huge floating ice pan broke off from the center of the lake and crashed into the dock, tipping it over and sending the multiple wooden plank sections floating all over the lake. Maybe there were no other docks in sight for a reason. Lesson learned.

After the dock installation, it was Wii time. We started with "Guitar Hero III" - which is a hell of a good time and makes those of us who had never rocked an "axe" before feel like VanHalen or Joe Satriani. But even more fun, was a game later discovered...

6 guys at the cabin amidst beer and chips and sunshine and BBQ and poker and motorbikes and power tools. What would you expect them to be doing? Why, inside playing "Dancing With the Stars" of course! Yes, it's true. I have to admit, it's pretty fun even if it does further reinforce the fact we have no rhythm. Here's proof:

Unfortunately, all the real good videos are greater than 100MB, so I can't post them...yet. Good times, good times!

Oh, a last tidbit. We found this little morbid caution sign on the keychain of Dr. Rob's riding mower. It gives good advice..."Don't run over your kids." Wow, thanks for telling me, I never would have thought.